End of April

It has been a lonely three and a half hours in the gallery.

I am the only place open around here, and the weather has been awful with rain and winds. I have just about run out of things to do. I could always go home, but I said I will be here until 5 pm, so I will.

The best and the worst is the music. Stuart set me up with a nice speaker that I operate from my iPhone. For a month I could blast it. What joy that brought! Then apartment dwellers moved in above me. Though less loud, I can still listen to French music, Marilyn McCoo, Madeleine Peyroux, and all my other favorites. Today it seemed that all the stations I listened to were too nostalgic, with a lot of music that reminded me of my mommy and daddy and my babies. I took it as long as I could. Finally I landed on London Music Works that spoke nothing to my earlier years.

One thing I wanted to do here is make pizza. Today was a good day to try it. I had bought a big convection toaster oven for the place, and yesterday I made pizza in it for the first time. The second time was today. Thank goodness I can eat all the gluten I want. Now I am comfortable with bringing in the quickly mixed dough from home, keeping toppings in the gallery fridge, and baking in the oven. Maybe someone other than me will enjoy it sometime.

Some lookers just came in. New Yorkers with a three month old black lab on a leash.

What else did I do here today? I blogged on my gallery website. I liked how it turned out. The website expects me (i.e. I expect myself) to blog occasionally, so I did. Doing it without interruptions helped.

About 3 pm, I walked down to the river. It was not raining, but wind was whipping around, and it sounded like there was conflict among the feathered wildlife. When they took note that a human was coming near, the squawking stopped.

Now it is about time to call it a day.

Portraits of the farm animals

An Oakdale Angel

Daffodil Beauty

It is incredible that anything grew in my backyard! So happy to have this Ice Follies daffodil showing its pretty face.

Beautiful day.

Out of the house with the hubster this perfectly gorgeous afternoon. We rode to the end of 421 and back. This pier that is beloved by many is closed. Cozy restaurants, closed. People who enjoy the outdoors? No problem.

nice pose

It's today again.

It is looking like there is an end in sight to America's response to the virus. That's good. I'm sure this has been hard on many people. For us "retired" folks on Social Security however, it hasn't made much of a difference, except for removing the guilt of having to do something useful. For me, I have been eating too much and exercising too little, but the funny thing is, I feel great! Maybe it is the good quality sleep and the lack of pressure.
It's also looking like the beginning of this particular strain of coronavirus has been identified, and that's a good thing, too. Much better to know than for it to be a mystery. Still somewhat of a medical person and one who took a variety of science classes, I know this will be fascinating for researchers. In my work, we loved to talk about interesting cases and situations, and I think all medical people enjoy it. I would however like to see less curiosity and experimentation about what evils can be concocted in a lab. It's wrong to mess with Mother Nature.
And it is Spring! The season the rest of the year lives for. Rebirth and renewal. It has been a wonderful time for us to slow down and think of what we have to be thankful for.

Fear

For a long time, I have had a pie in the sky idea that if I were going to write a thesis for a PhD, I would write it on fear. I was especially interested in it from the mental (my work) perspective, and I observed how individuals used it to keep their lives stagnant, to fail, to be dependent, and often to wallow in it. It was also interesting from a biblical view as it stood in opposition to a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7),  and from the many numbers of time that the readers are told not to fear.

Mark Twain said, "I have feared many things, and one or two have actually proven to be correct."

(Disclaimer here that sometimes a sense of fear can alert us to making safe choices, but I am not referencing that type of fear.)

With "news" about the coronovirus, there is the nuance that everyone is afraid. I recently read that fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. That is so often the case, and it is easy to jump to a conclusion without evaluating. I have found there is little else I can control in this life except for my behaviors and the way I see things, perceptions. It does take effort to change our thinking, but it can be done!

Anxiety is the most prominent manifestation of fear. It may be biological for some, but I think it mostly starts small with some life event, large or small, and builds. If only people would identify it and deal with it as unnecessary when it first looms over them.

So as to the current situation, what good is it to be afraid? Does it feed into some people's anxieties? Like everything else, the situation will run its course. We will do our parts. It will be less likely to spread if we practice good hygiene and practice sizable personal space. We also know that God hears and answers prayers. Fear is unhealthy. Life moves along. Let it go.

The Saturday after Good Friday

Kathy Troccoli is a singer I came to know through her signature song "Go Light Your World." I signed up for her mailing list a long time ago and receive occasional inspiring notes. This (copied and pasted) is what came today. I especially find it interesting because Saturday is the day of Easter week that receives little recognition.  saturday... He made Himself heard on thursday— ...before the disciples at the last supper. ..before the Father in gethsemane. He made Himself heard on friday— ...crying out towards heaven. ...the veil of the temple torn. ...the sun blocked. ...the earth shaken. then, saturday— nothing. Jesus in the tomb. no movement. no hope. nothing? yes...nothing. well, big clarification— nothing on earth.... i’ve always been amazed at this day... and always in hindsight—it has made me fall more in love with Him.   oh, how trustworthy. oh, how faithful. oh, the love...   kt

Changing Light

Light is the most important thing for artists and photographers, and today the fact was amplified. About mid-afternoon I went to the gallery. As you know it is by the Cape Fear River, and enjoying the freedom the current situation brings, I walked along the river, enjoying the pretty day. The old Cape Fear was dark, brownish-black, and I likened it to a smaller version of Ol' Man Mississippi, plain and wide. And there was nothing remarkable about the khaki and olive drab plants along the marsh except for their duty to nurture. Thirty minutes before sunset, I was back, and as the big ball giving light to the world was winding down its day, the river had the appearance of a clear, beautiful blue ocean with streaks of the palest blue. The changes continued til the sun disappeared behind the tree covered islet. And along the marsh, the camo landscape of earlier was alive with blazing orange and gold lights. The sunlight does all this. That is what the artist wants to capture, to make time stand still for a precious beautiful moment.

moving along

What a beautiful day! A clear Carolina blue sky, birds singing, a cool breeze. The rest of nature goes on unaware of the virus that is, at the present time, changing every human life. I hope I don't get it. I hope no-one I know gets it, and I hope it goes away quickly. Meanwhile I am enjoying the heck out of this wonderful gift of time and freedom. If I were still a nurse, I would gladly be out there on the front lines meeting the challenges, but fewer obligations come with age, and freedom is a byproduct.

One of the things I do to keep up with the coronavirus is read the transcripts of the President's daily "remarks" to the press, long press conferences in which he and other decision makers (MDs, military, cabinet secretaries, private sector contributors, etc) address what's going on. Trump is an amazing man, smart, hardworking, and with endless stamina. I am a grateful American.